Samuel told me he tried to make himself preoccupied to avoid having free time when he might think about was he really happy about his situation. The rain drops outside quite heavy every single day after arrived in his new accommodation. He could not care too much as he should focus, focus on something he made up, something worthless. But he just could not help overhearing the voice from the rain hitting the ground. It got heavier and heavier, so he stood up and tried to close the curtain above his desk. In this late rainy night, he did not know how dark outside was, the window just like a mirror to reflect his pale face and over skinny bone structure. When he looked himself in the mirror he was shocked, he could not image how pale he was, also he realised in front his window there was a cemetery full of countless tombs for hundred years. He was so scared that he hoped to get out the room to get some hot water from the kitchen. It was not that easy he told me, this kind of late night, he needed something in his hand to protect himself, but he could not find anything near him.
He started to sweat, the sweat almost wet himself the whole back, it seems like he was in the heavy rain. He stood up again from the bed, he opened the door, and peeked outside to see was that everything in order. He closed the door, sit on the chair, continued sweating, he did not want to do. But even worse thing happened, the light was cut off somehow, is it because of the heavy rain outside or something else? He moved to the bed to cover himself up using the duvet. He knew he should get out the room to switch the lights back on, he knew it, but he thought that would be really dangerous, what if someone was out, what if this situation was designed by someone. He really did not want to get into the trap, he preferred to sit and wait, maybe the lights would be back when the rain stops.
About half an hour, it was still dark, the battery on his laptop was dying, he started to panic that he could not let himself lying in the dark without seeing anything. He really needed to fix the lights now once he remembered he has a torch in his suitcase before he planned to come here. He jumped out the bed and went straight to the suitcase, by the light of laptop, he located the torch at the back of the big suitcase, he was still scared to get out, still. But this really made him quite angry about himself, all the lonely feeling was all back to him at this point, all him pretending for few days just vanished in vain. He knew this would happen, his anger made him brave enough to get out the room, to go to the kitchen to fix the light switch.
After he got there, it was sad that he had no idea how to fix it, he knew it should a switch on and off, just need to switch a button, but where was the button. The torch was about to die soon, he was exposed in the strange kitchen in the dark rainy night with the company of cemetery in front of window. He wished he could be at home, where he did not worry all about this. But now he should face it, he tried the last possible way he could, he fix the light, he cried and run back to his room jump on the bed under the duvet. But he had no idea that the light went back off again.
He was so scared, was it a joke or something?! He was on the bed, he thought he had to go back the kitchen, he had to switch the light back on without anyone’s help in this dark lonely night. This was what he had to face, he could not get away with it. He thought his twisted life right now just similar to Paul Smith’s slogan, however this twist was too much that he could not fight back, maybe he needed some new clothes from Paul Smith to cheer him up.